August 28, 2015

What Makes Us Parents?

I am a mother. It is the most honorable title I hold. I'm a photographer...a legal assistant...a friend...{sometimes a pain in the artichoke}...a lover...a fighter. But mother, that is a title I didn't apply for. I was given that title by Little Miss and have worked diligently each and every day to live up to the high standards of those moms before me. {My family rocks it at motherhood, the shoes I stepped into were huge.}

I was blessed to gain this title initially in the most conventional way- I simply gave birth. {15 hours of labor, simple} I gave birth and then took care of my daughter, in order to hold onto the honorable title. Others become parents by marrying someone who has children already or adopting...which still allows them the respective parent title.

I heard the wheels squelch to a screeching halt as some of you read that. You can become a parent by marrying another parent? It's contagious like that?! Well, only if you're born to be a parent- only if it's in your heart already. You don't just 'poof' become a parent- you have to prove yourself, no matter how you become a parent. I have heard an argument recently regarding step-parenting that totally struck a nerve. Oh, he's so good with her kids. Or- She treats his kids just like hers, even though they aren't her blood. This baffles me for one simple reason- if you adopted a child, would you treat that child any differently than your biological, blood-related child? Of course not. So why is it so surprising when you see a step-parent being...*shock* good at their job? It all boils down to loving a child and making sure their needs are met. Why would anyone ever want a child to feel like they are less than wonderful? Or worse, like they are not good enough? We could all learn a lesson from our children in that respect- they love with their whole hearts. They tend to not see color or judge what is normal- they simply see a person who cares about them, no matter what blood relation or title exists.

In our our home, we opted not to call each other step-anythings. I'm not a step-mother...that sounds so cliche and Cinderella-ish. {I would never let my hair be gray or wear those awful gowns.} We are bonus parents. Our girls are 'sea-stars' and the our titles to them? We are BooMa + BooPa. {We have called each other Boo from the start...our kids are super creative- bam, our names were born.} Being a bonus parent does not take away from our little one's biological parents' position- it simply adds to extra person to love, an extra person to learn from and look up to. Being a bonus parent and holding the title of BooMa is a pretty noble and rocking title, if you ask me. It was something I had to earn...and continue to have to earn. I am so proud to be able to add it to the list of my many titles.

Up next for new titles? Trick-rider. 

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