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October 30, 2022

16

Sixteen years ago, almost to the minute, I met the most incredible little person. In the first moments of staring into her eyes, I wondered a thousand wonders. Who would she become? What would her hobbies be? Who would she look like? What would her personality be? I hoped, wished, and prayed our bond would be as strong as mine is with my mom, who was looking over my shoulder with a smile brighter than I'd ever seen before. 

"Did you ever know you could love someone so much, baby?" my mom asked.

I didn't. I was quickly whisked out of labor and delivery, and into a room upstairs. It seemed like only a few seconds later my family was bidding me farewell for the evening and I was left alone with my new best friend. I was mesmerized by her and equally terrified I would do something to break her. I had mothered many animals- but human babies? I retired from my babysitting career after one summer. Babies were bossy, sticky, and kind of germy little creatures. But this one? This one was perfect.

After we came home from the hospital, our days became quite routine. My life had never been so routine, in fact. I learned quickly that Little Miss enjoyed a schedule and come hell or highwater (and sometimes she was the hell and the highwater) we were following the schedule to ensure a decent night of sleep. We blinked a few times too many, and the days of rocking chairs and bottles were traded in for strolls to the park and visits to the children's museum. Little did I know, the seasons that would follow would fly by faster each year.

I suppose every parent becomes nostalgic on their child's birthday each year. In reflecting today, I remembered the thousand wonders that flooded my mind as I stared into Little Miss's eyes for the first time. Who would she become? Her. She's become her, as simple yet complex as that sounds. She has become her own person; a person I am thankful to have had a hand in molding, but am not sure I did near as much as she did along the way. The truth is, just as she grew into herself, I grew into myself all because of her. She continues to teach me and mold me into a better person each day. What would her hobbies be? Well, what started as a hobby, quickly escalated into a career. Her heart is on the stage, and when she steps onto that stage, she becomes the character she portrays. Her work ethic at sixteen is stronger than most adults in this world. Who would she look like? Her Bub...100%. And sometimes, when she gets really excited to share a story, it is like looking in a shorter, brunette mirror. What would her personality be? Kind. So incredibly kind. She loves her people fiercely and would do anything in the world to support them. She can argue better than I ever hoped to and has a poker face that would even confuse Lady Gaga. 

The hope, wish, and prayer to have a bond like my mom and I's, a best friend bond, was answered, and then some. While our bond is absolutely as strong as my mom and I's, so is her bond with my mom. She, my mom, and I are like a tiny girl gang. We have traveled all over the east coast together to see concerts and countless theatre productions. Where one goes, so do the other two. 

Sometimes when we make a wish or say a prayer, I imagine God just winks at us. Already got it handled, boo...already got it handled.

March 14, 2022

Creatures of Habit

Feeding time. 6:30am every day.


This morning…one very short day into Daylight Savings Time, I yawn my way downstairs to feed the ponies.


“Good morning, babies! It’s breakfast time!” I say, at a dull but chipper roar. (You’re welcome, neighbors. This is also your alarm. Good morning.)


I hear a scuttling sound next to the barn and peek around the corner to see both horses stretching and yawning.


Tristan gives me the loving, side-eye we are both known for. 


The sun isn’t even awake yet, Ma…

“I don’t have time to watch the sunrise with you two…get in the barn so I can get your blankets off,” I say.


And so it begins. The snorting, stomping, and running of the trusty(?) steeds.


Nope…it’s an hour too early for breakfast. Something is wrong. Maybe the vet is coming? Farrier? Something is definitely up. She’s never down here this early. THE SUN ISN’T EVEN AWAKE.


“Get. In. The. BARN.”


She’s tricking us! It’s too early…maybe that isn’t even our mom!?! She’s never early. *makes large noise sounding like velociraptor* Spooks himself, other horse, and two goats. Now we have a running parade of animals, which prompts the dogs to start barking and my vocabulary to become more colorful.


I catch a glimpse of my reflection as the sun rises…with my beanie half way on, jacket thrown over my pajamas, and muck boots on…I’m really a vision. Coworker drives by…honks…parade of prancing idiots continues as I stomp off to grab a halter.


I catch Tristan, throw his halter on & take his blanket off as he stands perfectly still, like the gentleman he is.


“Alright…come on. Let's go eat breakfast,” I say, tugging on his halter.


No ma’am. We have 30 more minutes before the buffet opens for breakfast. I’ll wait. Stomps hoof, gentlemanly.


Hooves firmly planted. Not moving a whisker. I move over to Roscoe…who is certain the world is ending because that is apparently what Tristan has told him.


Nope! Simulation Mom…she’s an imposter!!! RUN EVERYONE RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!!


The parade begins again.


“FINE. YOU CAN SWEAT AND STARVE UNTIL I GET HOME FOR LUNCH WHEN WE TRY THIS F*$%ING SH%*SHOW AGAIN. YOU’RE BOTH JACKASSES.”


Both horses stop, look at me…then prance off in the opposite direction. (At this point, both sure I’m an imposter because I never yell at them. Okay…it’s rare.)


“But…I love you. MAKE BETTER CHOICES! And don’t forget to drink water.”





Happy Monday, everyone. No, riding a horse to work won’t be cheaper or easier than paying the rising gas prices- but it will be more entertaining.