August 4, 2015

Scary Shadows

Horse people know when they have found that horse. The one horse they have a stronger bond with than they share with most humans. The horse that with one nicker, one nuzzle or even just a simple look- you can tell exactly what they are thinking...and they can tell exactly what you need.

Recently, I've been taking my 'Pretty Fly White Guy', Tristan, out for evening strolls on his own. Leaving a pasture mate {security blanket, boss mare} at home can tend to create new obstacles. The first outing, I didn't test him...we rode down the road with many scary boat-monsters on blocks, with dumpsters that scary monsters jump out of, passing by the tarps that flapped in the wind, clearly showing their fangs. I let him look and take his time.

The next outing, we walked up to the dumpster {scary monster home} and sniffed it. Tristan snorted so loudly he scared himself...and myself. We rode down to the end of the road and out towards the docks to see a new monster. Boats in water...floating. {Clearly this is unnatural and unsafe, right?}

With each ride, Tristan's confidence grew and our bond got stronger. He didn't spook at the same 'monster' twice, he was aware and protective, but not screaming like a teenage girl in a haunted house. Each night after I unsaddled him- I would thank him for keeping me safe and he'd nuzzle me right back, thanking me for keeping him safe too.

Last night we went out just before dark. I needed the ride more than anything after a very long and stressful day. {A horse ride to a cowgirl after a stressful day is equivalent to an entire bottle of wine.} Tristan did great, we could both feel my stress fading away with each step he took. And then I did it...I ruined the calm horse by leaning forward and patting his neck.

"Good boy, T..."

He jumped-in-place, snorted and farted all at the same time. I look around- there was nothing but a man in the distance working on his boat.

He snorts again, at the pavement.

"'s your shadow! See?" I said moving my hand around.

He jumps, ears squared out like a donkey, and snorts again.

"You are literally scared of your own shadow."

Snorts again.

Sometimes no matter how big and strong you want to be, your biggest obstacle is yourself. 

The shadows reminded me of the fears that had grown in my own head before taking Tristan out, without his boss-mare. I worried he would be a complete psycho. I worried he would hurt me. I worried he would have a Storm-sized meltdown {the horse who almost killed me, who was promptly sold} even with our strong bond. I worried...about everything.

Thankfully, all those worries were just shadows...they weren't real. (And I didn't even have to jump/snort/fart to realize that.)

1 comment:

  1. Scared of your own shadow is not just a "saying". Things can become the same way in our head until we release them and share with someone we love. I love you. Mama