First Class Stinks! (Literally)

“The grass is always greener on the other side.”

My Daddy used to tell me this a lot when I was little. I always appreciated everything I had growing up- and still do. But there were times when my friends would have things that I didn’t and an ounce of jealousy would get sprinkled on top of the appreciation. He would always break it down for me- “You have a horse…you have both parents…you have, etc. Would you trade even one of those things, for what they have?” Never.

I was reminded of this yesterday during my flight(s) out to Casper, WY. I had two layovers, one in Cincinnati and one in Salt Lake City. Both were hardly layovers, as I had to run across the airport to catch both my flights…leaving just enough time to catch my breath before taking off.

When I got onto the plane in Cincinnati, I turned to the right- as always…and started looking for my seat number- 3A.

What? Why are these seats in the 20s and going up?

The flight attendant could see the confusion on my winded face and offered her assistance.

Oh, Ma’am…you are in first class.

REALLY? Are you sure?!

I’d never flown first class before so I immediately got super excited. (And also immediately thought “This has to be a mistake. But, whatever!”) I put down my bag and sat in the enormous (and comfy) seat. The flight attendant got me something to drink and I settled in for takeoff. I wondered if I’d ever want to fly in coach again, considering all the leg room and accommodations. That thought was halted when the person seated next to me arrived.

Let me just say…the grass might be greener- but that doesn’t mean a hill of beans if it smells like pure shit. This older lady smelled horrible. I’m not sure if she had a chronic gas problem or what but- it was impossible for me to breath the entire 3 hours. Honestly, I thought I was going to throw up. (And let this be known…the hot towels they give you up there, only made the smell worse.)

Aside from the odor, my other first class companions had absolutely no personality. In fact, they looked at me like “Why is this young, skinny, bitch in first class? Ugh, she is in jeans…” I made an attempt to bite the bullet and speak to Mrs. Stinky-Britches and she mumbled an answer and looked away. However, she had no problem chatting it up with Mr. Dick Snobby in the opposite row. (He was clearly not in nose-shot of her.)

I have never appreciated a tini-ini coach seat more than when I got on my connecting flight in Salt Lake City. It was a pleasure to sit in the cramped seat, next to a normal person and smell nothing but jet fuel.

This Is What Happens…

…when you let your daughter hang out with Paul Wall.

Little Miss & her grills.

Mother’s Day 2008

Just in case you are a Mommy and I did not get a chance to wish you a Happy Mother’s Day on Sunday…Happy Mother’s Day!!

We spent our day in Richmond, VA and I was not only fortunate enough to spend the entire day with Little Miss, but also with my mom and dad! We had an early dinner at Morton’s Steakhouse, which was incredible. It was my first time and I am hooked! It took sincere determination to finish my Hot Chocolate Cake, but somehow I did.

Braunsteins, Spencers and Slaine at Morton’s

This little one is what made Mom’s Mother’s Day.

It was Mom’s first show so she was very excited to meet everyone and see everyone’s performances. (Daddy is a veteran at hiphop shows, you know.) It was cute to hear my mom tell my dad after meeting Paul Wall, “Awww, he is soooo southern, isn’t he!?” Which, if you know anything about my family…so are we!

Right before the show started- fists together everyone!!

Little Miss danced and waved her hands through the entire show. Since she has been attending almost every show on the tour, she knows her routine by heart. Before her Papa’s last song, she walks out front and is introduced to the crowd and then she’s allowed to go to Uncle Eclipse to play with the DJ equipment.

DJ Little Miss & DJ Eclipse

She’s a natural!

And since that was the last night on tour for Little Miss, we took lots of pictures of her with her tour-pals.

Little Miss & Gu…she can spot him a mile away. (Don’t let this picture fool you, she adores him.)

Little Miss & Rob…partners in crime.

“Who drew all over your head, Uncle Rob?”

She did make time to hang out with the other babies on the tour…here is”Lil Paul Wall.”

Hanging out on the Expensive Taste bus.

Trying to give him a kiss…

“Just so you know…I am the boss of all these buses.”

Now we are headed to the horse farm!!

*Be sure to scroll down for lots more photos from the bus & the NY show*

New York, New York!!

Tuesday morning we woke up in Allentown, PA…ironically parked directly in front of the towns numerous drug treatment/half-way house facilities. (Nothing like some strung out hecklers to start the day off right!) I was looking forward to this day in particular because we had a friend driving in from NY to pick us up right after the show and take us home! It would be the first night we’d slept in our bed, in our house in over a month!

Of course, we weren’t home long enough to really enjoy it. Honestly, it felt like a dream most of the time. Little Miss was confused to no end. She kept looking at her toys in the toy boxes and saying “Baby? Baby?”…as if to say, “A baby lives here? Where is she?” It was cute. She was not thrilled as thrilled as I was about the idea of sleeping in her own bed, in her own room. I tried and tried until I brought her into our comfy bed and made an attempt to bribe her to go to sleep. It felt like the alarm went off minutes after we all shut our eyes. But it turns out that a couple hours of sleep in a real bed, is just as restful as 12 hours in a bunk on wheels.

My hubby had to go shoot a video before the show started, so Little Miss, my MIL and I took advantage of Central Park! We had lunch right beside the park and then headed for the green grass! The weather was gorgeous and since it was a weekday, there weren’t herds of people in the park like usual.

After we walked around for a few hours, we decided to go to one of my favorite Central Park spots, the zoo. I love going to this zoo in particular because it isn’t so enormous. You can easily cover the whole zoo in a few hours and all of the exhibits are incredible. (Plus, the petting zoo rocks!!)

We started out by the sea lions, who were being fed their dinner. Perfect timing!

Then we made our way over to the snow monkeys.

My little monkey…learning a few tricks from the real monkeys. (And trying to keep the sun out of her eyes, it was crazy bright in this area of the zoo.)

As I mentioned, we’ve been to this zoo several times and we always miss the Red Panda. He tends to like to hide, apparently. But not today!

& here’s Little Miss looking at the Red Panda…

My favorite part of the zoo is the polar bear exhibit. We only saw one of the two bears but- he definitely put on a show for us.

“Who wants to snuggle?”

He even got his blankey out…

Check out how big his paws are…and his teeth!!

After we watched Mr. Polar Bear for a good hour, we rushed over to the children’s zoo to get a few minutes of goat/pig/llama/sheep/pig/cow petting and feeding in before the zoo closed. My daddy always jokes on my MIL about pigs because they are a very non-kosher animal. So we thought it would be a cute idea to take a picture of her with the pigs for him. Here you go, Daddy!

Since we were well on our way to getting kicked out of the zoo, I didn’t get any shots of Little Miss feeding the animals. However, she did such a good job with them that the grounds keeper did let us feed them some extra pellets. Here is who we fed…

We had a wonderful day back in NY. Even thought it was a quick trip, it was great to be home and great to spend such a gorgeous day with a couple of wonderful gals in the park!

…see, not all of NYC is skyscrapers.

The show last night was great. It’s very interesting to me to see how different crowds are in each city. Last night was definitely a NYC crowd.

We’re in Worcester, Massachusetts today- and so far the most exciting thing that has happened is that someone came and picked up our laundry for us!

Home, Sweet...Bus

I was so happy to see that big red bus sitting in front of the Omaha International Airport waiting for us when we got off our plane this morning.

It may sound silly...but I missed it! We have been on it so much in the last month that it really feels like our home away from home. And get this...I even unpacked already!!

We started our journey out to Nebraska at approximately 3am this morning. My daddy (Southern girls always call their fathers 'daddy'...no matter how old they are)...was kind enough to wake up and drive us up to Norfolk to catch our 6am flight. We used my navigation device to make sure we wouldn't miss any exits on the way to the airport. I should've know this was going to be a sight- my dad vs. the navigation. He talked back to her the entire drive to Virginia. And proceeded to argue with her as she took us through backroads. I had to laugh at him- because through all the arguing, he didn't miss a single turn that she suggested we take. ;)

We had a short layover in Cleveland, which is gave me just enough time to question somethings that go on in airports.

-Security...I'm glad they're there...but why are they all jackasses? I have water in my Little Miss's bottle...and I ask security "Do you have to test this? Because if you do, I'll just pour it out to save time."...and they say "No, it's fine." Yet, once it goes through the xray machine they snatch it away from me and tell me they must test it- it's a regulation...because I said it was water. ?!?!

-Why is it that the automatic toilets (in airports especially) flush 100 times when you are sitting on them, using them...but when you stand up and need them to flush, they refuse?! (AND...why when they flush and you are sitting on them- are they flushing so forcefully that it gets my entire ass wet? Unpleasant.)

-Birds inside airports...how do the get there? Are they ever able to get out? Little Miss and I fed a little Mama Ren bird today...I found it odd that she ate the egg of my sausage, egg and cheese biscuit.

That's all for now :) XOs!